They offed my favorite soap opera character.
\nHe was poisoned and strangled, found dead in a crashed Porsche.
\nCould have been his mercenary stepfather, mistress, daughter or maid.
\nHe’d recently argued with them all, though not at once.
\nAnd his recent heavy drinking problem was getting in the way of his coke abuse.
\nMaybe it could have been his dealer or the drifter he’d abused at the station.
\nThey found an eight page suicide note, penned by his spurned wife,
\npinned to his pant leg by a large kitchen knife. No fingerprints.
\nDaughter has disappeared with stepbrother. Were spotted on another network.
\nMaid and mistress, both beautiful, have grown close and whisper a lot.
\nEvil stepfather is same suit size and has a huge closet. Drifter was in a union.
\nCould have been his bookie. Horse tranquilizers were found in his blood.
\nThe only ones who cried at the funeral were his wife and the drifter’s lawyer.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"