{"id":1305,"date":"2019-01-23T03:39:23","date_gmt":"2019-01-23T08:39:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1305"},"modified":"2019-01-23T03:39:23","modified_gmt":"2019-01-23T08:39:23","slug":"when-you-wish-upon-a-tsar","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1305","title":{"rendered":"When You Wish Upon A Tsar"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>The Tsar made me do it.<\/div>\n<div>I didn&#8217;t quite think through it.<\/div>\n<div>Convinced me that collusion<\/div>\n<div>was nothing but illusion.<\/div>\n<div>I wanted a hotel<\/div>\n<div>and figured\u00a0what the hell.<\/div>\n<div>I guessed I could get by<\/div>\n<div>by acting as a spy.<\/div>\n<div>So I became their mole,<\/div>\n<div>their stinking commie troll.<\/div>\n<div>I had a lot of debt.<\/div>\n<div>It all seemed a good bet.<\/div>\n<div>So I became their plant.<\/div>\n<div>And I went on a rant.<\/div>\n<div>Said immigrants are bad.<\/div>\n<div>It drove the people mad.<\/div>\n<div>I covered all the bases,<\/div>\n<div>appealed to all white faces.<\/div>\n<div>And when the fix was in,<\/div>\n<div>the reds said I would win.<\/div>\n<div>Now that I&#8217;m head of state,<\/div>\n<div>I realize, too late,<\/div>\n<div>I should have had more reason.<\/div>\n<div>My coda could be treason.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Tsar made me do it. I didn&#8217;t quite think through it. Convinced me that collusion was nothing but illusion. I wanted a hotel and figured\u00a0what the hell. I guessed I could get by by &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1305\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1305","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2193,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2193","url_meta":{"origin":1305,"position":0},"title":"Seven Days in Maybe","author":"Rick Young","date":"October 27, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Last days of les fleurs du mal. Waiting now on the cabal to reject all kinds of voting, iced with their condensed fraud coating. They'll inject a dose of panic, and the king, at his most manic, will dip into his trick trough, screaming the election's off. There is no\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":729,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=729","url_meta":{"origin":1305,"position":1},"title":"Sorcerer&#8217;s Apprentice","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 26, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Once there was a president who was, in fact, insane. He thought that the office was meant only for his gain. His head looked like an orange and his hair looked like a pelt. His best debating tactic was to hit below the belt. He made fun of the crippled\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":834,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=834","url_meta":{"origin":1305,"position":2},"title":"Kronen","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 6, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Zeb collected Kronen. He had several passed down from his great grandparents, whom he'd called 'Hessa\" and 'Squadroon,' for no apparent reason. He'd been told that they were from 'the old country,' somewhere in Austria, but got confused and used to tell classmates they'd once owned a kangaroo farm. Zeb\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1854,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1854","url_meta":{"origin":1305,"position":3},"title":"Perverted Birdsong","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 25, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Ducks fly south and geese fly north. Don't know why this back and forth. Hawks fly east and doves fly west. There's one bird that flew the best. THE DODO. Yes, the dodo, the whole avian kingdom's Quasimodo. That bird in his prime was not the chub you see in\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Song&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Song","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=30"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1528,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1528","url_meta":{"origin":1305,"position":4},"title":"Say, kids, what time is it ?","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 26, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"T'was way back in the days of Howdy Doody I heard a jumpin' song called \"Tutti Frutti.\" The radio was suddenly alive with more than just the standard pap and jive. I gave up Gene and Roy to hear that Elvis boy. There came a time in life I call\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1626,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1626","url_meta":{"origin":1305,"position":5},"title":"Warren Piece","author":"Rick Young","date":"March 5, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Word just came that Liz quit the presidential biz to join with mister money on the sideline. Goodbye to wealth tax thrown into the deep unknown. Goodbye to child care and student debt guideline. Her numbers became dire though she threw Mike in the fire, but the dream of White\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1305","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1305"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1305\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1306,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1305\/revisions\/1306"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1305"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1305"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1305"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}