{"id":133,"date":"2013-11-22T02:49:31","date_gmt":"2013-11-22T07:49:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=133"},"modified":"2013-11-22T02:49:40","modified_gmt":"2013-11-22T07:49:40","slug":"nicotine-nanny","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=133","title":{"rendered":"Nicotine Nanny"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Beside the bassinet,<br \/>\nshe&#8217;ll light her cigarette.<br \/>\nThe babies in her care<br \/>\nhave smoke rings in their hair.<br \/>\nSometimes near diaper rashes,<br \/>\nyou&#8217;ll even find her ashes.<br \/>\nAnd baby&#8217;s first words often<br \/>\nare simply, &quot;please stop coughin&#8217;.&quot;<br \/>\nShe&#8217;s a nicotine nanny,<br \/>\na two-pack granny.<br \/>\nShe&#8217;ll take care of your young,<br \/>\nbut they&#8217;ll need an iron lung.<br \/>\nIt takes her five puffs, maybe,<br \/>\nto sing &quot;Rock-a-bye-baby.&quot;<br \/>\nAnd while they bathe<br \/>\nwith rubber duckies,<br \/>\nshe&#8217;ll smoke three<br \/>\nunfiltered Lucky&#8217;s.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/Family.jpg\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-134\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/Family.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"family-jpg\" width=\"1024\" height=\"1024\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-134\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Beside the bassinet, she&#8217;ll light her cigarette. The babies in her care have smoke rings in their hair. Sometimes near diaper rashes, you&#8217;ll even find her ashes. And baby&#8217;s first words often are simply, &quot;please &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=133\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[3,4],"class_list":["post-133","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2","tag-poem","tag-poetry-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2103,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2103","url_meta":{"origin":133,"position":0},"title":"Grin and Barrett","author":"Rick Young","date":"October 12, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"She's a registered fetus saver. That's her peculiar flavor. No biblical contortion says Jesus hates abortion. But she'll control your motherhood by voting Roe v. Wade's no good. She claims religion won't distract her. Lifetime piety's no factor. She's a woman just like you, just spends more time in a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":921,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=921","url_meta":{"origin":133,"position":1},"title":"Somewhere in Kansas","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 23, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Dorothy's hallucinating again. The telltale stare. The bulkhead stair. Playing the game, rolls a six, then boxcars, sixty-six. 666. The Oz number. Twister on the near horizon and she's outside for the dog, a heroine to love and sing with. She'll get help, as always, a team to talk her\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1589,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1589","url_meta":{"origin":133,"position":2},"title":"Nevada Test Site","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 19, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Debate night tonight, Bloomberg on the spot. He thinks he can buy elections, Bernie says, \"'Fraid not.\" Klobuchar and Buttigieg shall battle for the middle. Biden, looking sleepy, will play \"Hey Joe\" on the fiddle. Liz will be the liberal schoolmarm, but she's looking thin. All six who are in\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":105,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=105","url_meta":{"origin":133,"position":3},"title":"Courteous Mallflower","author":"Rick Young","date":"November 17, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"She takes her picture once a week in that old photo booth. She once fell down outside of Sears and chipped a baby tooth. She buys her jeans and magazines and cigarettes all there. At CVS she buys a gel to colorize her hair. One time she stretched out on\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poetry&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poetry","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=2"},"img":{"alt_text":"KnockKnock","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/KnockKnock.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/KnockKnock.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/KnockKnock.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/KnockKnock.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/KnockKnock.jpg?resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1620,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1620","url_meta":{"origin":133,"position":4},"title":"Always In Love With Amy","author":"Rick Young","date":"March 2, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Amy joined the race in a snowstorm. Now she's dropping out in a shit storm. She joins a list of famous Minnesotans, all of whose candidacy was verboten. Harold Stassen, Gene McCarthy, Hubert Humphrey, all lost but none were quite so bad as Walter Mondale's fall. Now she'll throw support\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1757,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1757","url_meta":{"origin":133,"position":5},"title":"Mothers of Intention","author":"Rick Young","date":"May 10, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers still alive, those who weren't sent under by our president's deep dive. And sorry, too, to any mothers out there who lost sons, whether it's to tiny germs or giant army guns. Would have liked to send out to the store and get\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/133","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=133"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/133\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":135,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/133\/revisions\/135"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=133"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=133"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=133"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}