{"id":1511,"date":"2020-01-20T11:51:40","date_gmt":"2020-01-20T16:51:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1511"},"modified":"2020-01-25T02:31:36","modified_gmt":"2020-01-25T07:31:36","slug":"cartoon-rule","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1511","title":{"rendered":"Cartoon Rule"},"content":{"rendered":"

Our great Space Force soon will visit Pluto.<\/p>\n

And Spinach Navy will take care of Bluto.<\/div>\n
Goofy’s our new Defense Secretary.<\/div>\n
New Supreme Court: Curly, Moe and Larry.<\/div>\n
Ghost Rider heads the Department of Arson.<\/div>\n
Head of Sleep remains our own Ben Carson.<\/div>\n
Melania, of course, is now The Queen.<\/div>\n
And King of Comedy is Mister Bean.<\/div>\n
While Rudy G. will rule the inner city,<\/div>\n
the suburbs\u00a0are in charge of Walter Mitty.<\/div>\n
Wile E. Coyote will patrol the border,<\/div>\n
with help from Zorro, Czar of Law and Order.<\/div>\n
Maleficent will control immigration.<\/div>\n
Chris Christie heads Department of Vacation.<\/div>\n
Ivanka will remain Goddess of Lust.<\/div>\n
Her name will replace God’s as whom we trust.<\/div>\n
And Porky Pig, as head of Education,<\/div>\n
will move our country toward a stutter nation.<\/div>\n
Donald Duck will become Aide De Camp.<\/div>\n
New State Department: Lady and the Tramp.<\/div>\n
Pinocchio as Minister of Truth<\/div>\n
will exonerate poor John Wilkes Booth.<\/div>\n
And, last but not least, will be Daffy Duck,<\/div>\n
who becomes the Minister of Do Not Give a Fuck.<\/div>\n
All this ruled by Tiny Orange Hand.<\/div>\n
God protect our animated land.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Our great Space Force soon will visit Pluto. And Spinach Navy will take care of Bluto. Goofy’s our new Defense Secretary. New Supreme Court: Curly, Moe and Larry. Ghost Rider heads the Department of Arson. Head of Sleep remains our own Ben Carson. Melania, of course, is now The Queen. And King of Comedy is […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1511","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":229,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=229","url_meta":{"origin":1511,"position":0},"title":"Husking the Peepers","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 17, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Cantankerous Vichy swans ! It\u2019s best beware of birds in foreign markets. To be pecked by voodoo chickens or bored silly by emus is not a circumstance that I could bear. And so I head for the shrunken heads, which run a bit more francs but are quite tasty parboiled.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/SWan.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/SWan.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/SWan.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/SWan.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":152,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=152","url_meta":{"origin":1511,"position":1},"title":"Scavenger Protege","author":"Rick Young","date":"November 28, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm going to buy some chickens down in Chinatown. On Kneeland Street, you hear them bleat, their entrails on the ground. They're disemboweled daily. The pigeons have a feast. It seems an end, alas, my friend, too foul for even beast. But people need their chicken, like people need their\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/Duck.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/Duck.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/Duck.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/Duck.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1991,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1991","url_meta":{"origin":1511,"position":2},"title":"XXX Pillow","author":"Rick Young","date":"August 17, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"They say that Jeffrey Epstein was smothered by My Pillow. His ashes will be spread on Pedo Isle. That's if they find his body, last seen in Amarillo, and probably headed southward for a while. They say a lot of famous folks spent time at Jeff's resort. Word has it\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Story"","block_context":{"text":"Story","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=34"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":597,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=597","url_meta":{"origin":1511,"position":3},"title":"Monosyllabic Valedictorian","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 22, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"I am pleased to be here now as the head of this great class. I know my marks were good, but I am no more than you. We all had a good time. We all learned what we must. Good friends were made and lost. Not all of us loved\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1860,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1860","url_meta":{"origin":1511,"position":4},"title":"Fore Heads","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 30, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"The king heads to Mount Rushmore on the third. He wants to shit on their heads like a bird. The giant three slave owners, enough to give him boners; he likes the fact they won't get in a word. The worry is he'll climb up on their faces, searching for\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2260,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2260","url_meta":{"origin":1511,"position":5},"title":"Black Friday","author":"Rick Young","date":"November 23, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Black Friday, in the days gone by, used to be a riot. Now, it's all just shop at home, and everything is quiet. But, in the times before, they'd mass outside\u00a0the door, as if hungry or poor, then charge into the store. There'd even be fist fights about their buyer's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1511","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1511"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1511\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1524,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1511\/revisions\/1524"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1511"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1511"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1511"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}