And what came first, the peanut or the egg?<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
News has come of Mister Peanut’s death in a crash of Planter’s Nut Mobile. So I sit here, sobbing, with peanuts on my breath. They said Mister was behind the wheel. Peanuts should not be … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1522","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":514,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=514","url_meta":{"origin":1522,"position":0},"title":"Talking Her Down","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 4, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Don't wed that fool. He's still in school. You'll work to pay his loan. His head's too big, his eyes too small. And listen to his tone. He's mister smart. He's mister right. He's got just every answer. You'd think that he has done something: found god, cured aids or\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1222,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1222","url_meta":{"origin":1522,"position":1},"title":"Shortchanged","author":"Rick Young","date":"March 24, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Mister Sessions, I don't deal in heroin or blow. I don't deal in oxycontin, either. But now, for legal weed, you want to put me on death row. Relax, chill out, AG, you need a breather. I thought the rules had changed regarding marijuana's sale, the benefits realized in legal\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1643,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1643","url_meta":{"origin":1522,"position":2},"title":"Hanks For The Memories","author":"Rick Young","date":"March 12, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Forrest Gump's down in the dumps, got chills, starting to shiver. Captain Sully, quarantined, says go jump in the river. Sheriff Woody feels no goody, cannot catch his breath. Jimmy Dugan, from the bench, feels like he's caught his death. Even Mister Rogers can't\u00a0roam through the neighborhood. And Joe, who\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1736,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1736","url_meta":{"origin":1522,"position":3},"title":"Indoor Games","author":"Rick Young","date":"April 28, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Guess I'll count the forks again. The prize this time: a nip of gin. I know the spoon count now by heart. And knives were there right from the start. Yes, counting silverware is in my guide on stupid things to do while stuck inside. Another thing is taking matched-up\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "List"","block_context":{"text":"List","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=32"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1199,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1199","url_meta":{"origin":1522,"position":4},"title":"Malapropic Oversight","author":"Rick Young","date":"March 11, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Zen parasites amass in subtle grandeur. Invincible, inviolate and destitute. Imagination spawns balloons of oversight. The helix doubles back along its route. We are helpless. Help us, Mister Everything! Put our feet upon the path secure. Malapropic oversight means nothing's right. And life goes by, unrecognized, a blur.","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1018,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1018","url_meta":{"origin":1522,"position":5},"title":"Tavern Talk (1998)","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 14, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"We all elbowed up to the bar, thinking Sunday\/Monday in a Tuesday kind of way. On the t.v. came another launching. Puppets on the railing gave us shoeshines. Everyone was thinking entertainment. We had many colonies to dream of. All the while the bottles danced with dust. Rusty old men\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1522","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1522"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1522\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1523,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1522\/revisions\/1523"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1522"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1522"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1522"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}