{"id":1579,"date":"2020-02-16T17:43:59","date_gmt":"2020-02-16T22:43:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1579"},"modified":"2020-02-16T17:43:59","modified_gmt":"2020-02-16T22:43:59","slug":"senior-citizen-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1579","title":{"rendered":"Senior Citizen One"},"content":{"rendered":"

If he wins, he’ll turn the White House to a nursing home.<\/p>\n

First state of the nation with a walker.<\/div>\n
Before each appearance, activate the Depends Drone.<\/div>\n
A nurse will follow him just like a stalker.<\/div>\n
Ramps will replace all the stairs and corners be filed down.<\/div>\n
Pillow-covered floors in case he falls.<\/div>\n
Ambulance turned limo will now take him around town.<\/div>\n
Hearing aides will answer all his calls.<\/div>\n
In the oval office, he can sit and meditate,<\/div>\n
to contemplate his coming term’s adventures.<\/div>\n
His staff will insure there’s only soft things on his plate.<\/div>\n
Right by the button, there will sit his dentures.<\/div>\n
Metamucil will become official White House fare<\/div>\n
and be served at Presidential dinner.<\/div>\n
In his words, youth has been served and now it’s only fair,<\/div>\n
a really old, old man should be the winner.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If he wins, he’ll turn the White House to a nursing home. First state of the nation with a walker. Before each appearance, activate the Depends Drone. A nurse will follow him just like a stalker. Ramps will replace all the stairs and corners be filed down. Pillow-covered floors in case he falls. Ambulance turned […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1579","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":750,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=750","url_meta":{"origin":1579,"position":0},"title":"Old Cats","author":"Rick Young","date":"August 4, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Old cats in black boots and dirty jackets sit around a fire, burning tire, pass around a hit. They talk of Eisenhower, Vietnam and J.F.K., of families and old friends who are not around today. Most are vets and some served in the war to end all wars. How can\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1560,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1560","url_meta":{"origin":1579,"position":1},"title":"In Stitches","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 8, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"The Don is giving pink slips to his enemies within, making sure the backstabbing will not happen again. Oh sure, he says, they\u00a0stabbed me, even though it was the truth; they soiled my name, my fame, my game. It was all quite uncouth. 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Now he's drifted to a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Song"","block_context":{"text":"Song","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=30"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2633,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2633","url_meta":{"origin":1579,"position":3},"title":"This Year’s Gift","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 25, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"On Christmas I heard a few footsteps downstairs. I snuck to the steps, clutching one of my bears. What I saw down there took my breath away. There sat old Santa, no suit and no sleigh. He looked very tired, in overalls clad. When I saw no presents, I thought\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":590,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=590","url_meta":{"origin":1579,"position":4},"title":"Inbred and Buttered","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 16, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"All the townsfolk who pray to the lion and lamb have decided that justice is rarely well done. All the saints ate the sinners, served up in a jam. Now the sisters of mustard all carry a gun. And the banks have closed down. And the schools are encampments, as\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2625,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2625","url_meta":{"origin":1579,"position":5},"title":"Doling Out Facts","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 8, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Bob Dole is gone and cast now as a patriot and hero. Yet his post-senate career rates somewhere less than zero. He whitewashed lobbyists from oligarchs to kleptocrats. He spent his late years ushering a host of foreign rats. The former nominee also endorsed the orange don. 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