{"id":1607,"date":"2020-02-26T16:23:43","date_gmt":"2020-02-26T21:23:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1607"},"modified":"2020-02-26T16:23:43","modified_gmt":"2020-02-26T21:23:43","slug":"the-emperors-new-disclose","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1607","title":{"rendered":"The Emperor’s New Disclose"},"content":{"rendered":"
He's got NDA in his DNA.<\/pre>\n
It’s just the way he likes to play.<\/div>\n
Take off your clothes, do not disclose,<\/div>\n
sign on the dotted line.<\/div>\n
I’m no bachelor, you’re no rose,<\/div>\n
just drink a bit more wine.<\/div>\n
I’m not saying you’re a slut,<\/div>\n
just want to keep your damned mouth shut.<\/div>\n
A nothing tryst, you get the gist,<\/div>\n
one night and then forget.<\/div>\n
I’ll add you to my growing list<\/div>\n
of things I like to pet.<\/div>\n
Speaking of pets, girl, you’re no bunny.<\/div>\n
Your bod’s an eight, your face is funny.<\/div>\n
You should be glad I had my way with you.<\/div>\n
And if you say a word, be sure I’ll sue.<\/div>\n
I’ve had my share of porn stars, strippers,<\/div>\n
older women, some young nippers.<\/div>\n
You’ll learn to wear your shame one day<\/div>\n
just like a badge of honor, say.<\/div>\n
Now you must leave at once, my dear,<\/div>\n
before the wife returns.<\/div>\n
The bruises that I left will fade,<\/div>\n
as will those red rope burns.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
He’s got NDA in his DNA. It’s just the way he likes to play. Take off your clothes, do not disclose, sign on the dotted line. I’m no bachelor, you’re no rose, just drink a bit more wine. I’m not saying you’re a slut, just want to keep your damned mouth shut. A nothing tryst, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1607","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":822,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=822","url_meta":{"origin":1607,"position":0},"title":"Pill Papa","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 29, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Can you write me a prescription, doc, for some dilaudid, please? I heard it helped with Elvis. I have trouble with my knees. And maybe a few percodans would help me with my head. But if you're running low on those, darvon will do instead. Of course I'll need some\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":794,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=794","url_meta":{"origin":1607,"position":1},"title":"Bypass","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 15, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Ten years ago today, my heart went on a short vacation. It called me in my dream state from a pay phone at a station. \"I'm sitting just outside your chest. It's really quite a view. Don't worry, get yourself some rest, I'll be back in a few. Amazing how\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1689,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1689","url_meta":{"origin":1607,"position":2},"title":"Lone Ranger Guilt","author":"Rick Young","date":"April 4, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Lone Ranger wore a black face mask and had a native slave. He had a horse named Silver and he never missed a shave. But Clayton Moore was quite a bore and wore masks after quitting. You're not the Ranger any more, they said. He said, You're shitting. Tonto'd\u00a0back\u00a0to Silverheels,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2302,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2302","url_meta":{"origin":1607,"position":3},"title":"Garden Party","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 25, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Come get your pardon, available down at the Rose Garden, redecorated, because the other way my wife hated. Your pardon costs less than did changing this mess. It's not just us. We've got expenses. And then again there's also the two Pences. Here I am, fighting off libels. All they\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":586,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=586","url_meta":{"origin":1607,"position":4},"title":"Hubcap Bub","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 14, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"I pick up things from off the street and sell 'em. Whenever words come to my head, I yell 'em. They call me Hubcap Bub because I've got a big collection. Folks can stop on by my shack and make their own selection. I sell all but the shiny ones\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1920,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1920","url_meta":{"origin":1607,"position":5},"title":"Kiss My Glove","author":"Rick Young","date":"July 20, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"\"I will eventually be right.\" Our population might be slight. Then I can reign them in real tight. Which is the purpose of my fight. I'd like to get it down to two percent. I think that's what the founding fathers meant. We'll build a wall of dead, then pour\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Song"","block_context":{"text":"Song","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=30"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1607","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1607"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1607\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1608,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1607\/revisions\/1608"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1607"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1607"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1607"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}