{"id":1657,"date":"2020-03-19T11:26:54","date_gmt":"2020-03-19T15:26:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1657"},"modified":"2020-03-19T11:26:54","modified_gmt":"2020-03-19T15:26:54","slug":"going-fishing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1657","title":{"rendered":"Going Fishing"},"content":{"rendered":"

Steve Minnowchin is gonna throw some money in,<\/p>\n

so you can origami\u00a0while sequestered.<\/div>\n
A thousand paper cranes will not relieve the pains.<\/div>\n
Though it might help with boredom that has festered.<\/div>\n
For now it’s just green paper, there’s nothing left to buy.<\/div>\n
You might as well use it as toiletry.<\/div>\n
You could make a funky money suit like David Byrne’s,<\/div>\n
so mourners can think, “Funny man, was he.”<\/div>\n
Maybe you can pay off roving gangs looking for food,<\/div>\n
or buy a gun from someone in an alley.<\/div>\n
You can smoke a dollar bill when you get in the mood,<\/div>\n
relax and sing the love theme from “Death Valley.”<\/div>\n
You can paper bathroom walls with twenty dollar bills<\/div>\n
or lounge inside a bathtub full of dimes.<\/div>\n
Money coming through the mail may cure a couple ills,<\/div>\n
but, ultimately, it will lead to crimes.<\/div>\n
Where we gonna go, with our big bucks in tow?<\/div>\n
The shelves are empty in most every store.<\/div>\n
Maybe you can buy hooch from a dealer in skid row<\/div>\n
and lay out drunk for three weeks on your floor.<\/div>\n
So, thank you, Steve Minnowchin, for your ultimate concern,<\/div>\n
but your stimulus is less than stimulating.<\/div>\n
We’re watching out our windows for the whole damn town to burn,<\/div>\n
while our mailboxes sit, mouths open, waiting.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Steve Minnowchin is gonna throw some money in, so you can origami\u00a0while sequestered. A thousand paper cranes will not relieve the pains. Though it might help with boredom that has festered. For now it’s just green paper, there’s nothing left to buy. You might as well use it as toiletry. You could make a funky […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1657","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1729,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1729","url_meta":{"origin":1657,"position":0},"title":"Cashing In Your Checks","author":"Rick Young","date":"April 23, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Go ahead and bet your stimulus check. A grand just will not do it, so go crazy, what the heck. However, there's no horses racing. Blame the social distance spacing. Baseball, even football, might be gone. Pubs are closed, so there's no darts. Bookmakers have closed their charts. Maybe bet\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Story"","block_context":{"text":"Story","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=34"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":194,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=194","url_meta":{"origin":1657,"position":1},"title":"Play The Roll","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 7, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"I've seen good gods up and die, or grow old gracefully. I've paid for some bad advice, and gotten good for free. I've laundered all my money, in the hope that I'd come clean. I've been caught top and bottom, and, one awful time, between. I've squandered time on things\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Roll.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Roll.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Roll.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Roll.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1980,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1980","url_meta":{"origin":1657,"position":2},"title":"Schooling Unspooling","author":"Rick Young","date":"August 10, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Some kids go back to school today, as ordered by our leader, protected by their masks and plexiglass. It's not the school of olden days; there is no Weekly Reader, instead a constant threat inside the class. Coronavirus is now every school's new bully boy. It wants your grandma's life,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1596,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1596","url_meta":{"origin":1657,"position":3},"title":"Nicking a Name","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 21, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Seeing news, I note he just gave \"Parasite\" a kick. Think he wanted that title for his own bio-pic. I'm sure we can probably find a better one than that, a monster name like \"Hairwolf\" or maybe \"Frankenfat.\" A song title, perhaps, like Bowie's \"Man Who Sold the World,\" or\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "List"","block_context":{"text":"List","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=32"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1648,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1648","url_meta":{"origin":1657,"position":4},"title":"Mayday Pray Day","author":"Rick Young","date":"March 15, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"It's a national day of prayer, declared by King Fuckwad. But the virus doesn't\u00a0care. It can't be killed by god. While we're on our knees, praying to a vapor, and trying not to sneeze, we\u00a0still need toilet paper. And as we ask for spirit help to keep us from the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2009,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2009","url_meta":{"origin":1657,"position":5},"title":"Place Markers","author":"Rick Young","date":"September 7, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"On Labor Day we celebrate how our great country works. The rich pay us to kill ourselves and then treat\u00a0us like jerks. We celebrate the forty hour week, plus overtime. They work\u00a0us hard and bleed us dry. Their money is a crime. They live in mansions inside gates and take\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1657","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1657"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1657\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1658,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1657\/revisions\/1658"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1657"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1657"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1657"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}