{"id":2043,"date":"2020-09-16T20:33:05","date_gmt":"2020-09-17T00:33:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2043"},"modified":"2020-09-16T20:33:05","modified_gmt":"2020-09-17T00:33:05","slug":"big-daddy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2043","title":{"rendered":"Big Daddy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Look, over in the corner.<\/p>\n<div>It&#8217;s Daddy Longlegs.<\/div>\n<div>You know, the one who<\/div>\n<div>killed the Brown Recluse.<\/div>\n<div>Even the Black Widow<\/div>\n<div>is afraid of this bad daddy.<\/div>\n<div>Who&#8217;s actually a good daddy,<\/div>\n<div>guarding his eggs valiantly.<\/div>\n<div>He&#8217;s only got one set of eyes,<\/div>\n<div>and looks to kind humans<\/div>\n<div>for good shelter,<\/div>\n<div>except in Antarctica.<\/div>\n<div>And he has one impressive<\/div>\n<div>body segment.<\/div>\n<div>He&#8217;s probably got thousands<\/div>\n<div>of friends, some old as seven.<\/div>\n<div>He&#8217;s an urban legend.<\/div>\n<div>But be careful of his legs.<\/div>\n<div>They won&#8217;t grow back.<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Look, over in the corner. It&#8217;s Daddy Longlegs. You know, the one who killed the Brown Recluse. Even the Black Widow is afraid of this bad daddy. Who&#8217;s actually a good daddy, guarding his eggs &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2043\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2043","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1577,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1577","url_meta":{"origin":2043,"position":0},"title":"Banana Kreme Republic","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 15, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Down in Mar a Lago he's installed his own rice paddy. People love a dictator. Reminds them of their daddy. He's thinking of banana trees, as part of the illusion. He's begun to celebrate the fruits of his collusion. He's got slaves (he calls them knaves) who do his every\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1989,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1989","url_meta":{"origin":2043,"position":1},"title":"Ballotized","author":"Rick Young","date":"August 16, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Mail-in Fraud's demon god will spit venom daily, like William S. Paley, threateningly, gaily. He is sending signals in his ever-changing hair. Had to cut his ties with ties. Deep surveillance there. He's rounding-up mail boxes for a hostage situation, first extortion broadcast live on every FOX news station. A\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":912,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=912","url_meta":{"origin":2043,"position":2},"title":"Father&#8217;s Day","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 19, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Happy Fathers' Day. The hours melt away. Only two more left to sell these cards. Door to door we'll go, knocking, don't you know, selling reminiscence and its shards. And it's Daddy, Daddy-Oh. How I love you, head to toe. Your boots are just the fruits of love's sweet stand.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1537,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1537","url_meta":{"origin":2043,"position":3},"title":"No Threat. No Threat. You&#8217;re the Threat !","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 30, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Oh, please, friends, interfere in this election. I don't know who my friends are. There's such a great selection. I may have pissed off Macron and that poof Justin Trudeau, but I've got pals like Daddy Vlad and Rocket Kim YoYo. My homies are all dictators and they'll blow you\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":423,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=423","url_meta":{"origin":2043,"position":4},"title":"Baseball Birthdays: May thirteenth","author":"Rick Young","date":"May 13, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Dusty Rhodes was noted for his many clutch pinch hits. He was a Giant at the plate. His fielding was the pits. Leon Wagner, \"Daddy Wags,\" hit homers for five teams. He wound up homeless in L.A. and died with shattered dreams. John Roseboro was battered by the Giants' Marichal.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":832,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=832","url_meta":{"origin":2043,"position":5},"title":"Easy Bake","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 4, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Jenna's favorite present from Santa was the Easy Bake Oven. She always watched her mommy in the kitchen and was eager to imitate the cooking process, in her cute little apron. In fact, the very next day, she made cupcakes for her parents, baked them for six hours under the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2043","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2043"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2043\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2044,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2043\/revisions\/2044"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2043"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2043"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2043"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}