Rotund king in gold bodysuit\u00a0enters right,
\ntips his hair, tells a few one-liner lies, exits left,
\nvery slowly, down a small ramp, trips, rolls offstage.
\nFour elderly white men in turtle suits march in, singing:
\n” Our king is a good man who hates bad protestors,
\nwho’ll team up with Q to undo all molesters.
\nIf you vote against him, you’re worse than wet worms.
\nYour house will soon be sprayed with pandemic germs.”
\nThey exit, slowly, right, toward a sign that reads “SWAMP.”
\nRotund king reemerges, plumps into a large gold throne.
\nAttorney General dances a shuffle before him in a cat suit.
\nHe licks the milk the king has left him in a golden bowl, pauses, sings:
\n” Our king can’t be bothered with things like elections.
\nHe’s too busy making his golf club selections.
\nThere is no pandemic. It’s all an illusion.
\nNow I must get back to my Russian collusion.”
\nHe huffs off in enormous cat’s feet, heads to the right.
\nRotund king spray paints his face, picks up his gold phone,
\npunches buttons with a flourish and screams “Hello Pooty!”
\nVlad the Inhaler enters from the east, bare chested, chants:
\n” Your king does my bidding, yes, but it’s for your protection.
\nThere’s no way to stop him now. This is the resurrection.
\nAnyone who dares oppose will soon be wearing fetters.
\nRussia and USA merge. You just add three new letters.”
\nHe mounts a small trojan horse and rides off tossing condoms.
\nRotund king stands atilt, waving a MAGA handkerchief goodbye,
\nsummons his family, a princess, knave, joker, handmaid and geek.
\nQueen Melanin struts on stage in a jacket that says, “F-Off!” and sings:
\n” My man loves grabbing pussies and boning porn stars.
\nHe says he’ll be first to put women on Mars.
\nHe told me be best and that means always looking pretty.
\nIf I get wrinkles, he’ll send me off to anarchist city.”
\nShe flounces offstage right to whistles and wolf calls from backstage.
\nRotund king, sweating copiously, stands, dripping puddles on the boards.
\nHe picks up a bible, holds it up, sets it afire. Repeats with\u00a0the Constitution,
\nthen, at center stage, winds a red tie about his head like a bandana, screams:
\n” You’ll never be rid of my golden fleece face.
\nWhen the time’s right, my kids will take my place.
\nNothing you do can stop my tyranny.
\nWave bye-bye now to your land of the free!”
\nHe ties on a stars-and-stripes cape, floor-length, and shuffles off, leering.
\nParamilitary ushers storm the aisles and the audience is arrested. Finis.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Rotund king in gold bodysuit\u00a0enters right, tips his hair, tells a few one-liner lies, exits left, very slowly, down a small ramp, trips, rolls offstage. Four elderly white men in turtle suits march in, singing: ” Our king is a good man who hates bad protestors, who’ll team up with Q to undo all molesters. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[34],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2063","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-story"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1598,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1598","url_meta":{"origin":2063,"position":0},"title":"King of Fraud","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 22, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"The King of Fraud thinks he is god. No law or rule can touch him. Amazing how the lurching clod persuades his mass to clutch him. His wispy wig and paint-on tan are awkward and appalling. He does his thinking on the can where his great bulk is sprawling. He\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":60,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=60","url_meta":{"origin":2063,"position":1},"title":"Shallow Dive Syndrome","author":"Rick Young","date":"November 14, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"I remember eating supper Off of father\u2019s head. Shallow dive syndrome Had left his noggin Flat as a table. Even the egg rolls Wouldn\u2019t roll off. Sometimes he\u2019d cut his hair In checkerboard pattern, And let us kids play Chess and \u201cking me\u201d While he read his books. Of course\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poetry"","block_context":{"text":"Poetry","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=2"},"img":{"alt_text":"Bag Face","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/BagFace.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/BagFace.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/BagFace.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/BagFace.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1860,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1860","url_meta":{"origin":2063,"position":2},"title":"Fore Heads","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 30, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"The king heads to Mount Rushmore on the third. He wants to shit on their heads like a bird. The giant three slave owners, enough to give him boners; he likes the fact they won't get in a word. The worry is he'll climb up on their faces, searching for\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2213,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2213","url_meta":{"origin":2063,"position":3},"title":"Aftermath","author":"Rick Young","date":"November 9, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Vote counters are getting death threats. Trump people don't like\u00a0mathematics. Besides, their king says he would bet they're rapists and drug addicts. \"A boy who dotes on numbers, like a girl\u00a0who plays with guns, just cannot be familiar with the way this country runs.\" And so his people wait outside,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2285,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2285","url_meta":{"origin":2063,"position":4},"title":"Execucutioner","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 11, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"A spree of executions in his last months as the king. As far as hurting people goes, he hasn't missed a thing. Even Kim K couldn't talk him into clemency. He's out the door, will try no more for simple decency. He's got way too much on his mind to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1158,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1158","url_meta":{"origin":2063,"position":5},"title":"Last Request (UGHotD#1)*","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 9, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Most of all, I'm going to miss the music. Food and drugs and drink were fun as well. But, it is song that I'll miss most dearly when I finally make my way to hell. Hell is just an eight-foot plot of bare earth, six-feet deep and covered with a\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2063","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2063"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2063\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2129,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2063\/revisions\/2129"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2063"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2063"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2063"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}