{"id":2071,"date":"2020-09-29T09:40:56","date_gmt":"2020-09-29T13:40:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2071"},"modified":"2020-10-14T07:14:34","modified_gmt":"2020-10-14T11:14:34","slug":"fetus-force","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2071","title":{"rendered":"Fetus Force"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>The government wants your uterus.<br \/>\nPlease mail it in a plain brown\u00a0package<br \/>\nto Fetus Force, A.C.B. div. \/SCOTUS9.<br \/>\nIt will be reprogrammed, micro-chipped,<br \/>\npatriotically decorated and returned<br \/>\nwith proper child-bearing instructions.<br \/>\nA list of government-approved names<br \/>\nand occupation choices will be included.<br \/>\nFetus Force trackers will trace slackers<br \/>\nand offer standard sterilization services.<br \/>\nStrong and healthy babies will be eligible<br \/>\nfor the maga-race\u00a0initiation program,<br \/>\nand even the future leaders honor roll.<br \/>\nPromising infants may be enrolled<br \/>\nin our SocietyWantsAllMotivatedPeople<br \/>\ntraining school in a highly secret location.<br \/>\nPlease comply immediately.<br \/>\nDo not risk the wrath of Fetus Force.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The government wants your uterus. Please mail it in a plain brown\u00a0package to Fetus Force, A.C.B. div. \/SCOTUS9. It will be reprogrammed, micro-chipped, patriotically decorated and returned with proper child-bearing instructions. A list of government-approved &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2071\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2071","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":793,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=793","url_meta":{"origin":2071,"position":0},"title":"Creep in the Heart of Texas","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 14, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"A couple days ago, I miscarried. Just a little blob covered in red. Now they tell me it's got to be buried. Bad enough my zygote child is dead. Fetus funerals are the law in Texas. Strange new rules now suddenly abound. Bring it to the graveyard in a Lexus.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2539,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2539","url_meta":{"origin":2071,"position":1},"title":"Texas Hold &#8216;Em","author":"Rick Young","date":"September 3, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Texas got things all out of proportion. Need a person swing for an abortion? Bounty hunting fetus crime? They are going back in time, Christians stalking med providers as if they were freedom riders, shutting off all women's rights as if they were dimming lights. They would better judicate men's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1377,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1377","url_meta":{"origin":2071,"position":2},"title":"Wade in Hot Water","author":"Rick Young","date":"May 24, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"The body politic has gotten very sick. It's almost ripped from torsion. There's rape and incest on the right. It might need an abortion. But on the scene the zygote team amasses for protection, their only goal to save your soul and give you a C-section. Your fetus is a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":860,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=860","url_meta":{"origin":2071,"position":3},"title":"There Ought To Be A Law","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 17, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"This White House will undoubtedly go down in history. The president's our first ever to be on PCP. The madness doesn't stop at that; it's all been quite consistent. The vice president named a fetus to be his assistant. The presidential spokesman had a problem with his rage. And the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2103,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2103","url_meta":{"origin":2071,"position":4},"title":"Grin and Barrett","author":"Rick Young","date":"October 12, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"She's a registered fetus saver. That's her peculiar flavor. No biblical contortion says Jesus hates abortion. But she'll control your motherhood by voting Roe v. Wade's no good. She claims religion won't distract her. Lifetime piety's no factor. She's a woman just like you, just spends more time in a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2195,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2195","url_meta":{"origin":2071,"position":5},"title":"Riding with Oligarchs","author":"Rick Young","date":"October 28, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Barrett and Barr were riding in a car, chatting on the things that really matter. As they drove, one didn't have to travel very far to realize this wasn't idle chatter. \"First we'll kill their health care,\" Barr remarked, joy unconcealed, \"and then we'll up the sick count with our\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2071","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2071"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2071\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2126,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2071\/revisions\/2126"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2071"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2071"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2071"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}