{"id":711,"date":"2016-02-27T10:44:05","date_gmt":"2016-02-27T15:44:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=711"},"modified":"2016-02-27T10:44:05","modified_gmt":"2016-02-27T15:44:05","slug":"mink-mange","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=711","title":{"rendered":"Mink Mange"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I hope you&#8217;re not too angry<br \/>\nthat I shaved your old fur coat.<br \/>\nThe protesters got to me.<br \/>\nFur is murder, it seems.<br \/>\nSo I&#8217;ve disguised the dog<br \/>\nas your arthritic uncle<br \/>\nand let the cat know<br \/>\nwe&#8217;ll no longer be needing his services.<br \/>\nI&#8217;ve buried baby&#8217;s teddies<br \/>\nas a symbolic gesture,<br \/>\nand donated your questionable<br \/>\nfuzzy bedroom slippers<br \/>\nto some conscienceless charity.<br \/>\nFur is murder, it seems.<br \/>\nI hope I haven&#8217;t gone too far.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I hope you&#8217;re not too angry that I shaved your old fur coat. The protesters got to me. Fur is murder, it seems. So I&#8217;ve disguised the dog as your arthritic uncle and let the cat know we&#8217;ll no longer be needing his services. I&#8217;ve buried baby&#8217;s teddies as a symbolic gesture, and donated your [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[16],"tags":[3,4],"class_list":["post-711","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2","tag-poem","tag-poetry-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2706,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2706","url_meta":{"origin":711,"position":0},"title":"The Ballad of Bobby Crimo","author":"Rick Young","date":"July 5, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Murder chat rooms on the internet draw one in to crazies not yet met. Videos of bloodbaths filmed for fun. Cartoons of a shooter with long gun. Bobby's last post was of a beheading. He'll get revenge for years of bed-wetting. With auto rifle he climbed on a roof, shot\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":302,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=302","url_meta":{"origin":711,"position":1},"title":"Keeks (1994-2014)","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 19, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"The cat has used up all her lives. And leaves us with tears in our eyes. Bequeathed soft memories of fur. We'll miss her knead. We'll miss her purr.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/keek1994.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/keek1994.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/keek1994.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/keek1994.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":720,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=720","url_meta":{"origin":711,"position":2},"title":"Forced March","author":"Rick Young","date":"March 14, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"No fox in the hole. Ecological hunting has trimmed the fur from this vale. Vague bones kicked up by marchers are collected by the children as toys. Manufactured sound has disappeared. Question marks of smoke punctuate the sullen distance. Food is whatever is in the mouth. The hard times forecast\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":233,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=233","url_meta":{"origin":711,"position":3},"title":"Converse Caveman","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 18, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"The best rocks roll uphill. Fire is an animal on the horizon. Fur is very, very in. Little roar means hunt. Big roar means hide. Wood is good, but tres pass\u00e9. He finds random grunting tedious. He'd rather be alone than roam in packs. He's secretly shedding. And the whole\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Caveman.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Caveman.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Caveman.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Caveman.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":500,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=500","url_meta":{"origin":711,"position":4},"title":"Pound of Flesh","author":"Rick Young","date":"October 25, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Dog men bark in afternoon breezes, fetching papers to train masters, tails awag for justice. The bone of existence. They run in packs, an army of homeless carnivores clawing evening alleys for scrap iron and wire, building small houses of waste and wood. They snap and chew, growling stomachs, barking\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2644,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2644","url_meta":{"origin":711,"position":5},"title":"Communion","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 15, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"In times of stress and sorrow, times when I feel alone, I don't look towards tomorrow, I simply pray to my phone. In times when I need uplift, when I could use a pet, I pass by fur and, in a blur, look up cats on the net. And when\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/711","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=711"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/711\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=711"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=711"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=711"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}