Pebbles married Pogo and upgraded to a swamp.
\nScooby Doo and Snoopy had a wedding with much pomp.
\nDaisy Duck wed Road Runner; it happened much too fast.
\nSluggo married Orphan Annie; it’ll never last.
\nDennis hitched with Lucy and got into S&M.
\nElroy Jetson\/ Little Lulu; hey, good luck to them.
\nArchie did choose Betty, left Veronica in tears.
\nDilbert married Mary Worth; he’d had too many beers.
\nDora the Explorer ran away with Richie Rich.
\nUnderdog at last made Pretty Polly his true bitch.
\nSteve Canyon finally came to earth, eloped with Brenda Starr.
\nDaffy Duck, en route to chapel, got hit by a car.
\nTinker Bell (this hurts like hell) wed crazed Woody Woodpecker.
\nBetty Boop and Alley Oop bought their first double decker.
\nSure, there’s guys who’ll never marry, just to name a few:
\nBluto, Beetle Bailey, Goofy, Hulk, Mister Magoo.
\nAnd many a cartoon woman will stay an old maid,
\nsure the Jugheads of their world simply don’t make the grade.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Pebbles married Pogo and upgraded to a swamp. Scooby Doo and Snoopy had a wedding with much pomp. Daisy Duck wed Road Runner; it happened much too fast. Sluggo married Orphan Annie; it’ll never last. Dennis hitched with Lucy and got into S&M. Elroy Jetson\/ Little Lulu; hey, good luck to them. Archie did choose […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[16],"tags":[3,4],"class_list":["post-812","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2","tag-poem","tag-poetry-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1511,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1511","url_meta":{"origin":812,"position":0},"title":"Cartoon Rule","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 20, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Our great Space Force soon will visit Pluto. And Spinach Navy will take care of Bluto. Goofy's our new Defense Secretary. New Supreme Court: Curly, Moe and Larry. Ghost Rider heads the Department of Arson. Head of Sleep remains our own Ben Carson. Melania, of course, is now The Queen.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":514,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=514","url_meta":{"origin":812,"position":1},"title":"Talking Her Down","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 4, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Don't wed that fool. He's still in school. You'll work to pay his loan. His head's too big, his eyes too small. And listen to his tone. He's mister smart. He's mister right. He's got just every answer. You'd think that he has done something: found god, cured aids or\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":531,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=531","url_meta":{"origin":812,"position":2},"title":"Epidural Mentos","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 15, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"All the world's a speeding dot on someone's radar gun. We're the moving pieces of the television son. Dejection chords obtain unholy vim in trumpet layers. Competing shirt and shoe ads vie intensively for players. Chemicals and bullets have weighed down the paper ship. Please go to your local drugstore\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":169,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=169","url_meta":{"origin":812,"position":3},"title":"Cartoon Evolution","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 3, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"You'll have to go on inner wind to get to the heart of the cartoon monkey. To see the numbers dashed and sinned. The alphabet, your average junkie. And down the stairs of other worlds. And up into the light of silence. There's your shadow, locked and curled. Clouds are\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Monkey.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Monkey.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Monkey.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/Monkey.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1000,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1000","url_meta":{"origin":812,"position":4},"title":"Slashes Everywhere","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 5, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"You duck walk like a North Korean, Earlene insists, humorlessly. Tomorrow we'll be selling all my Chuck Berry records. We've only been on meth two weeks and already there are slashes everywhere, the couch, the shades, the freaking coffee table. My shirt. Her high tops. Next week we'll hock the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1233,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=1233","url_meta":{"origin":812,"position":5},"title":"Lap Band","author":"Rick Young","date":"April 8, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Scooter McQuail and the Faulkland Twins had this one song they sang with rosary beads in their mouths. Sounded like angels with special needs. And sometimes resulted in choking. Well, one could see how this could be redefined in devilish ways, and that, indeed, was the case, and they became\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/812","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=812"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/812\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=812"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=812"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=812"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}