She breeds like centipedes.
\nShe feeds. She needs. She bleeds.
\nThe suffering mother of millions
\naims high, perhaps even quadrillions.
\nHer womb is a room to so many,
\nit once earned a line from Jack Benny.
\nHer milk, if collected in jars,
\nwould reach half the distance to Mars.
\nShe has sixty daughters named Millie,
\nand unisex thousands named Billie.
\nThough none of ’em strays from her sights,
\nthere’s hardly a handful that writes,
\nHer life’s been spent spreading her legs.
\nWho knew she’d contain all those eggs?
\nThere’s sixty-five daughters named Janet.
\nHer spawn are all swarming the planet.
\nGod bless you, good mother of millions.
\nSurprisingly, most are Sicilians.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
She breeds like centipedes. She feeds. She needs. She bleeds. The suffering mother of millions aims high, perhaps even quadrillions. Her womb is a room to so many, it once earned a line from Jack Benny. Her milk, if collected in jars, would reach half the distance to Mars. She has sixty daughters named Millie, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[16],"tags":[3,4],"class_list":["post-823","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2","tag-poem","tag-poetry-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2653,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2653","url_meta":{"origin":823,"position":0},"title":"Bleak Redo","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 24, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Looks like we'll live through another war. Keeping peace since Little Boy's been what life's for. Defending Ukraine is a subtle task. Avoiding nukes now is all we can ask. A madman autocrat is on the move, a bit east of where Hitler got his groove. There's talk of cyber\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":361,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=361","url_meta":{"origin":823,"position":1},"title":"Baseball Birthdays: April first","author":"Rick Young","date":"April 1, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Rod Kanehl played second base for hapless early Mets. The fans all loved their \"Hot Rod.\" He was one of Casey's pets. Ron Perranoski was a Dodger relief king. In sixty-three and sixty-five, he won a series ring. Phil Niekro is a knuckleballer in the Hall of fame. 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I clipped the goal post and the salsa band. The rule: down over\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2621,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=2621","url_meta":{"origin":823,"position":3},"title":"Crude Awakening","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 4, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"California is killing the Amazon rainforest, exporting more crude oil than any other state. Sixty six percent of all extracted hits our country, and most of that is aimed for Cal, an overwhelming rate. Four hundred gas flares dot the Ecuadorian landscape, imperiling the health of indigenous tribes. The country\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":454,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=454","url_meta":{"origin":823,"position":4},"title":"Baseball Birthdays: June first","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 1, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Dean Chance won twenty and a Cy in nineteen-sixty-four. Had one more good year with the Twins, then heard from nevermore. Randy Hundley was a catcher known for his defense. He thought up fantasy camps, which have become immense. Derek Lowe helped Red Sox finally overcome the Curse. He beat\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poem"","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":482,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=482","url_meta":{"origin":823,"position":5},"title":"Baseball Birthdays: June twenty-second","author":"Rick Young","date":"June 22, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Carl Hubbell was a lifelong Giant, twice MVP, too. Sixteen years of scroogies made his left arm a corkscrew. Ron Hodges played twelve years with Mets. He grew up in the sticks. The total of the games he played was (gasp) six-sixty-six. 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