She breeds like centipedes.
\nShe feeds. She needs. She bleeds.
\nThe suffering mother of millions
\naims high, perhaps even quadrillions.
\nHer womb is a room to so many,
\nit once earned a line from Jack Benny.
\nHer milk, if collected in jars,
\nwould reach half the distance to Mars.
\nShe has sixty daughters named Millie,
\nand unisex thousands named Billie.
\nThough none of ’em strays from her sights,
\nthere’s hardly a handful that writes,
\nHer life’s been spent spreading her legs.
\nWho knew she’d contain all those eggs?
\nThere’s sixty-five daughters named Janet.
\nHer spawn are all swarming the planet.
\nGod bless you, good mother of millions.
\nSurprisingly, most are Sicilians.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"