{"id":949,"date":"2017-09-30T06:50:35","date_gmt":"2017-09-30T10:50:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=949"},"modified":"2017-09-30T06:50:35","modified_gmt":"2017-09-30T10:50:35","slug":"splitsville","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=949","title":{"rendered":"Splitsville"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A miasma of misinformed mitochondria<br \/>\nwere swimming in a pool of DNA.<br \/>\nPut on some suits, gadzooks, you&#8217;re<br \/>\nrisking hypothermia, said a neutron<br \/>\nwho was sitting far away.<br \/>\nIt is no use, this is abuse, said a flagellum,<br \/>\nwho just happened to be paddling by.<br \/>\nI challenge you all to achieve mitosis,<br \/>\nsaid a cell who was quite obviously high.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A miasma of misinformed mitochondria were swimming in a pool of DNA. Put on some suits, gadzooks, you&#8217;re risking hypothermia, said a neutron who was sitting far away. It is no use, this is abuse, &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=949\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[3,4],"class_list":["post-949","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poem-2","tag-poem","tag-poetry-2"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":620,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=620","url_meta":{"origin":949,"position":0},"title":"Adamant Eve","author":"Rick Young","date":"December 17, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Eve was teed off at her guy. He said he wanted apple pie. She was extremely discontented. Fire wasn't yet invented. Adam said they could adjust, maybe use some leaves for crust. Eve said no way she would bake. \"Why can't we just eat some snake?\"","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":293,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=293","url_meta":{"origin":949,"position":1},"title":"Native Tongue Depression","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 16, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"I asked the major general to please be more specific. \"Which would you rather capture, Atlantic or Pacific ?\" He said his plans were secret, which made uncommon sense. For, after all, his only goal was national defense. He said he had some tanks on hold and bombers in the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Native.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Native.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Native.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Native.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":542,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=542","url_meta":{"origin":949,"position":2},"title":"Whaling Walrus","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 22, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"There was a walrus used to hang with whales. His bonding efforts all were epic fails. He had no blubber nor blow hole. He didn't have a whaling soul. His tusks, they said, were too damned long. He couldn't sing the whaling song. His body couldn't glide throughout the water.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":712,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=712","url_meta":{"origin":949,"position":3},"title":"Revoice","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 29, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Back from the dead, he landed on his head, and from his mouth words bled: \"There's nothing to be said.\" He'd walked into the light, prepared to be contrite, but when the light turned red, he came back home instead.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":685,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=685","url_meta":{"origin":949,"position":4},"title":"Plant Life","author":"Rick Young","date":"February 4, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"I woke up rooted to the ground, within sight of no industry. A farmer with a shovel came across the field and stared at me, said, \"If you grow and blossom, that's the only way you will get free.\" And so I pledged my earthbound life to vegetable reality.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":290,"url":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?p=290","url_meta":{"origin":949,"position":5},"title":"Peg Legacy","author":"Rick Young","date":"January 14, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"It was said that Chopin had some ivory in his fingernails. Hemingway's autopsy showed his entrails were quite stuffed with quails. We must ultimately be resigned to the things we have to leave behind. Better to be friendly in the long run than to leave a legacy unkind.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Poem&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Poem","link":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/?cat=16"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Peg.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Peg.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Peg.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/redtinnoodles.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/Peg.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/949","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=949"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/949\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=949"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=949"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/redtinnoodles.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=949"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}