You’re the person of the year, so start this fire and fan it.

Yes, you’ve got electric cars and money everywhere.

So, it should be easy, get this creep out of our hair.

Tell him there’s a golden building somewhere in the sky.

Then pack him in, with all his bags, and, bingo, let him fly.

He can be emperor of space, a tiny orange star.

Let him pick the galaxy, as long as it’s real far.

And, if you do this, Elon, you’ll be worthy of Time’s praise.

And we will celebrate your moneyed goodness all our days.

Yet his post-senate career rates somewhere less than zero.

He whitewashed lobbyists from oligarchs to kleptocrats.

He spent his late years ushering a host of foreign rats.

The former nominee also endorsed the orange don.

His droll Dole sense of humor hid the fact he was a con.

So let’s not be so quick to elevate him to a saint.

He served well for the GOP, but hero he sure ain’t.

trying to get my vaccine on.

All this Covid variation

makes me long for a vacation.

Either an edenic field

or hermetically sealed.

Just somewhere the germs won’t spread,

or ’til everybody’s dead.

Virus, virus, burning bright,

please move to some other site.

Bezos, take it out to space.

Lay it on some alien race.

Nobel science, find a cure.

This is too much to endure.

Omicron, now what is next?

All the usual suspects.

Bat flu grew into a plague,

origins extremely vague.

Where and when it might mutate

on our planet’s petri plate

will determine the next surge

in this downhill people purge.

And so the songs of omicron

just go on and on and on.

exporting more crude oil than any other state.

Sixty six percent of all extracted hits our country,

and most of that is aimed for Cal, an overwhelming rate.

Four hundred gas flares dot the Ecuadorian landscape,

imperiling the health of indigenous tribes.

The country owes some twenty billion bucks to China,

and selling crude is one way to pay down these bribes.

California last year took in sixty million barrels,

half of all the crude that’s shipped out from the Amazon.

Sacrificing habitat brings with it many perils,

and the worst is it kills people when the trees are gone.

our great garbage island,

floating plastic twice the size of Texas.

Forty coastal species now inhabit the debris,

a waste ecology’s Pacific nexus.

The Great Pacific Garbage Patch,

all eighty-thousand tons,

is fed by folks on both sides of the ocean.

Its fishing nets and plastic bottles,

all sorts of our waste,

are swirled together by the ocean’s motion.

It could evolve a whole new species,

garbage-dwelling plants,

feeding clinging species in the drift.

Thank you, science, once again.

Apocalyptic dance

seems to be your one eternal gift.