Red Tin Noodles

I stalk this region. I’m the rule that runs this game. Like darts of icy wind I whistle through your brain. I drive you to the street with eyes red and insane. You might do … Read more

Jack Ruby was promised a big boat for his deed, but got sent up the river, a patsy, too, indeed. His killing of Lee Oswald was an undercover job. But never trust your cover when … Read more

He elbowed his way up to the bar and said, "Bartender, can I have a coke?" He wore a suit of crimson like a star and said, "Excuse me, can I bum a smoke?" I … Read more

There is no future left in transformation. You’re met with insolence and condemnation, the awful tearing sound of separation , and constant knocking causing bad vibration. Too late to move, there’s just too big a … Read more

Honor hunkers in the alley of the apes, eager to commence her new withdrawal. Anytime violence bleeds the people, she’s on a train, lit out for parts unknown. She covers the land like a hesitant … Read more

A kleptomaniac takes things and won’t give back. A robber often uses force and risks a stint in jail, of course. Pickpockets stick to wallet stealing, in your pants without you feeling. Thieves now don’t … Read more

She used the office fax machine to reproduce her parts. Her arm was just magnificent. Her leg was off the charts. She sent a xerox of her foot to some guy with a fetish. He … Read more

At last there was a sorrow we could not throw a rope on. The barn burners left cuff links in the ash. The funereal nimbus appeared. This was the ticket no one wanted, a nightmare … Read more

Another departed holiday is all over the cellar floor: the miniature tree, plastic holly strands and boxed effigies. Stockings once hung with care and the odd ornamental ball, all dead to the mind until next … Read more

All file cabinets look the same to one in the shoveling game. I was yanked off the main land, fitted with a tight armband, ordered to alphabetize words I didn’t recognize. If I worked for … Read more

We need a sharp-edged ruler, who can spy upon us, too, a real protective leader, a Governor Gumshoe. He’ll pound his dreaded gavel if we have too much fun. Then, if we don’t settle down, … Read more

An early interception changed the game’s complexion. After two substantial kicks, the spread was back up to six. Looked as if the football gods once again had nailed the odds. But a short-pass-fueled long drive … Read more

Satchmo, Miles, ‘Trane, Pharoah, Diz, tell you what a player is. Sacramental blue high notes, wails and honks and sailing boats. Silence, violence, bleep to bawl, horn of plenty says it all. Horn of plenty, … Read more

Corporal Geometry informed Private Equation, "W’ell have to take Right Angle Hill if we’re to save this nation." But Major Addition said there was one condition. It seemed Sergeant Subtraction had seen too much combat … Read more

I woke up rooted to the ground, within sight of no industry. A farmer with a shovel came across the field and stared at me, said, "If you grow and blossom, that’s the only way … Read more

There is no proper substitute for a good yodel parade. Mountain men and cowboys come from every glen and glade. They flock into the town of choice to try to win some prizes, with their … Read more

The groundhog sees his shadow and we’re all for six weeks doomed. Whose idea was it to have this poor beast exhumed? There must be other rodents on whom we could pin our luck, something … Read more

Gravitational update indecisive, as indicated by floating peas, bees sucked into dark holes and seas flat, motionless. Whilst in theory we madly spin, the rope simply hangs. Beyond the kicking legs of swingers, the street … Read more

I knew a woman who got things all wrong. She’d quote a poem, say it was a song. She’d call a gong a bell, a bell a gong. She’d go on much too much and … Read more

Whatever you do, don’t go near the quints. They’ll pluck your eyes and grind them into mince. Born to evil and grown madder since, their very presence makes one want to wince. It’s just as … Read more