Red Tin Noodles

Well, at least we won the big one. Nothing Trump can do to spoil it. But, unless we get those Georgia seats, we’ll still be in the toilet. Mitch will freeze the senate with his … Read more

Come get your pardon, available down at the Rose Garden, redecorated, because the other way my wife hated. Your pardon costs less than did changing this mess. It’s not just us. We’ve got expenses. And … Read more

The Don must cross the Rubicon, as mandated by QAnon. The act would be a right wing pleaser, if he went all Julius Caesar. General Flynn is all in favor. Martial law’s his favorite flavor. … Read more

When General Flynn talks martial law, Trump thinks about Matt Dillon. In every Gunsmoke that he saw, there always was some killin’. His chance to shoot folks on the street might be around the corner. … Read more

T’was a long and twisted road, knowing not what it forebode. Colbert wept election eve. Outcome we could not conceive. Hillary was the wrong choice, shady past and grating voice. Still, who thought the Don could … Read more

Billy, Barr the door. He’ll be A.G no more. Word is that on Christmas eve, this sly sycophant will leave. It is said he lost Don’s favor when the big hoax didn’t savor. The fraud … Read more

Charlie Pride has died of Covid complications, first black superstar to play on country music stations. Sara Palin took to Georgia, urging “crush the vote,” wearing buckskin, in, we hope, her final fool’s footnote. L’il … Read more

A spree of executions in his last months as the king. As far as hurting people goes, he hasn’t missed a thing. Even Kim K couldn’t talk him into clemency. He’s out the door, will … Read more

He’s grifting on his way out the door. What’s left behind will be a grim eyesore. He’s pulling up the carpets from the floor. They’ve let him loose and there will be much more. He’ll … Read more

Come on down to Buy A Pardon. It’s paradise without the garden. It’s Eden with a lot more snakes. It’s where big bucks buy bigger breaks. No matter what your lowdown ways, we’ll have you out … Read more

Will Trump sell our secrets to the Russians to pay debts? When he leaves his office, that’s the utmost of our threats. He’s talked of secret weapons. Those details are worth some dough. What goes … Read more

The gourd tradition on Thanksgiving was passed down from dead to living. Gourds were always on the table, in the hut, the barn, the stable. The fourth magi brought a gourd, never made it to … Read more

Trump’s pardon of Flynn today followed the pardon of a turkey. They say the next one up in line’s the Notorious Beef Jerky. Then liberate some KFC, and Popeye’s chicken, Ooh-ooh-wee. Then let’s get donuts out of jail … Read more

Black Friday, in the days gone by, used to be a riot. Now, it’s all just shop at home, and everything is quiet. But, in the times before, they’d mass outside the door, as if hungry … Read more

I saw Satan at my polling place. He had horns and all, but he had Jared’s face. Wearing a nice suit, he looked quite tall and pale. But, looking down beneath his cuffs, I know … Read more

Six scythes sigh citing sight’s slight size. Contemporaneously, the clown chief juggles balls in the oversize pockets of golf pantaloons. His jesters, the caddies, the sick secret service, all watch in astonishment balls fly all … Read more

The talking heads illuminate the dead. But nothing that they say has any cred. The numbers are not taken as a fact. The word of this decade might be ‘redact.’ With snow about to glisten, … Read more