by Rick Young | Jan 23, 2019 | Uncategorized
The Tsar made me do it.
I didn’t quite think through it.
Convinced me that collusion
was nothing but illusion.
I wanted a hotel
and figured what the hell.
I guessed I could get by
by acting as a spy.
So I became their mole,
their stinking commie troll.
I had a lot of debt.
It all seemed a good bet.
So I became their plant.
And I went on a rant.
Said immigrants are bad.
It drove the people mad.
I covered all the bases,
appealed to all white faces.
And when the fix was in,
the reds said I would win.
Now that I’m head of state,
I realize, too late,
I should have had more reason.
My coda could be treason.
by Rick Young | Jan 20, 2019 | Uncategorized
Bats flew like helicopters
from stadiums, sandlots and parks,
all across the sports-infected country.
It was the first protest of its kind.
Inappropriate usage of trees, they ranted.
Last year they’d ruined dear football
with their chants about saving brains.
And hockey has long been a styrofoam sport.
Next year they will focus on MMA
with a call for the incorporation
of body painting within the ring action.
Mixed Partial Arts will never fly.
The moving backboard all but killed hoops.
And the elderly-in-crosswalks
addition will be the end of NASCAR.
All this to pump up the ratings for war.
Generals want that sweet advertising money.
And the pop-up battles have, indeed,
captured the public’s attention.
Gunshots aren’t quite so scary
when it might just be a game breaking out.
