He’s cornered the bullshit market,
eating Denver mints
and popping pesos madly.
He’s in love with the ruble,
and makes origami wallets
out of thousand dollar bills.
He collects sand dollars,
in case Atlantis rises.
He calls his mother "Drachma."
He takes no Canadian quarter,
and calls the lira lyrical.
He cries out wildly
during stock reports,
and sleeps upon a mattress
stuffed hard with confederate bills.
His banker calls him Big Bill,
but around the office
he’s just known as Buck.