Emperor’s Nu Close
Death toll now tops nine-eleven. Settin’ up spare cots in heaven. Good thing Trump kept numbers down. He should wear a golden crown. Maybe a red cape velour, on each arm a gorgeous whore. On … Read more
Monthly Archives: March 2020
Another Thirty Days
Trump’s Easter ‘aspiration’ caused lots of consternation. Now ‘good things’ should be happening by June. We’ll see ‘the bottom of the hill,” for real or by the force of will. A hundred thousand will have died … Read more
Indiscretion Alley
“Sarkafo” Gus was not a social distancing believer. He’d prowl the street quite indiscreet, a ciggie butt retriever. He’d kiss a baby, kiss a dog, if any were around. He’d pick up pennies, anything that’s shiny, off … Read more
Dogged Rhymers
Doggerel sages earn no wages, no health benefits. Maybe fill three hundred pages. All the news that shits. We are like the olde town criers, rhyming in the night. He would say we all are … Read more
Yahrzeit
Two years ago today, my mother died. I’m glad she did not have to see this end. When her mind fled somewhere deep inside, she still thought the world was her best friend. She remembered … Read more
Dope Opera
Trump’s fireside chats are driving me bats. A lumbering leech eyeing docs. He’s probably wearing red underwear and black with a toe hole silk socks. He nods and he squints like the inkling he had … Read more
Kite on the Highway
Been drivin’ all night with a thorn in my side. Been drivin’ all night with a thorn in my side. Looked over at the passenger side and Jesus had died. What would we do now, … Read more
Worse Than The Problem
In three weeks, we can work while we are sick. Or so says mister bungle, our head prick. Don’t worry ’bout the spread, we don’t want business dead. So let it kill the weak, like … Read more
Beastly Times
My thinking cap’s been on a nap, or else I think of dying. I get up like a normal chap, then back to bed go, sighing. I really hate to watch the news, though nothing else is … Read more
Sanders Kernel
Drop out, Bernie. It’s too late. Get some social distance. Your ideas have to wait. Build up your resistance. If the world survives this test, you might run again. So your platform was the best, … Read more
Aid Bill
Just when you thought this pandemic was too much to hack, the latest news to hackle blues is “Bill O’Reilly’s Back !” On the internet, he’s pimping some stock guru’s scam. Grab the wealth and … Read more
Going Fishing
Steve Minnowchin is gonna throw some money in, so you can origami while sequestered. A thousand paper cranes will not relieve the pains. Though it might help with boredom that has festered. For now it’s just … Read more
Faux Seuss
O what has become of the Truffula trees that swayed in the cool summer breeze? The Lorax has fled, the Once-ler is dead, because of a deadly disease. In the Grickle grass there lay the … Read more
Mule Train 19
What I see in my head is a mule train for the dead and the dying crying out along the road. Some near-dead jump aboard, they want to see the lord, without the strength to handle their … Read more
A-Men
Now we all shall die in homes entombed. While lawns at Mar-a-Lago are still groomed. Ivanka makes designer purses, unavailable to nurses. Those who’d save us do so at their risk. This is even worse … Read more
Mayday Pray Day
It’s a national day of prayer, declared by King Fuckwad. But the virus doesn’t care. It can’t be killed by god. While we’re on our knees, praying to a vapor, and trying not to sneeze, we still … Read more
Tested
Nazi drug addicts have brought us to this point of contemplation. The bear just ate the market as part one of a forthcoming compensation. The virus is like Bernie Sanders, taking down the richest of … Read more
Hanks For The Memories
Forrest Gump’s down in the dumps, got chills, starting to shiver. Captain Sully, quarantined, says go jump in the river. Sheriff Woody feels no goody, cannot catch his breath. Jimmy Dugan, from the bench, feels … Read more
Rocky Road
The president will challenge this new virus. They say he’s got more balls than Miley Cyrus. He’s hanging out with men who’ve been exposed. “It can’t touch me,” he claims, and case is closed. He … Read more
Maxed Out
Max von Sydow had to die so now we’re in a twist. Our president’s possessed but we have no exorcist. Now all the white house beds and lies will have to keep on spinning. Trump’s … Read more