The Tsar made me do it.
I didn’t quite think through it.
Convinced me that collusion
was nothing but illusion.
I wanted a hotel
and figured what the hell.
I guessed I could get by
by acting as a spy.
So I became their mole,
their stinking commie troll.
I had a lot of debt.
It all seemed a good bet.
So I became their plant.
And I went on a rant.
Said immigrants are bad.
It drove the people mad.
I covered all the bases,
appealed to all white faces.
And when the fix was in,
the reds said I would win.
Now that I’m head of state,
I realize, too late,
I should have had more reason.
My coda could be treason.
